See, the thing is, I don’t even remember when it happened
at no point did I look up and notice, didn’t have that satisfaction.
By the time I realized where I was, I didn’t have a choice
I thought I could speak without you, but then I found my voice.
The mind, the heart, and the body don’t always work together
the body always falls first, quickest to break the tether.
Eyes send a response to the brain, “I want that”
close the eyes and the desire remains, the armor is cracked.
The heart falls second, and I don’t even hear it
those around me saw it first, on the sleeve I wear it
I started out in denial, but when I look back I’d swear it.
The heart is a trickster, those who own it don’t know it’s intentions
my actions told others what I didn’t even mention.
My mind was the last to trip up, hard to pin down.
Our minds, we’re guarded against ourselves, told from the start what to expect
told if our partners aren’t this or that, we won’t have the desired effect.
Somebody pleasing, but not too pleasing, somebody experienced, but not too experienced
somebody not broken, but still in need of fixing, somebody predictable, but not on the fence.
All these preconceptions, these misconceptions, these expected models of standard
these ideas, these notions of the perfect yet fixable person, it’s an undefinable word
Because that word, and those people don’t exist
we’re all broken quite a bit
and despite what we’re taught from a young age, I think the mind knows it.
That’s why the mind is the last to fall
when I saw the real, the person she is, the flaws
and she showed me who she was, down came the walls
and the love came cascading down like a waterfall.
The life we’re taught to live, the people we’re taught to attract
it doesn’t really work, life is more of a fall followed by adjustment instead of a journey of facts
So when you fall, embrace the fallen barriers
When the mind recognizes the real, it’s a new track on the stereo.